Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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