So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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