i think my mom watched the whole time
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
