: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Randomize
