Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize