i don't plan on having that self control this summer
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize