Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
