I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Randomize
