This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
