Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
You should frame my arrest warrant.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
