Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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