found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
