is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize