ya dads aren't the best wingmen
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I think my fart just growled at me.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
