My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Will you blow on my dice?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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