Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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