If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize