i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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