the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
