And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
