If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize