I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
