You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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