What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.