Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize