Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Semen is not good for contacts.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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