I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
