HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
