yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
