you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
We left an ass print on the piano.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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