it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
