Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
