i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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