"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
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