erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
