All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
