the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Randomize
