Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Two words: blizzard sex
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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