3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
you have to choose: penises or morals?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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