Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
