This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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