I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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