what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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