I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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