I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
