were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
