K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
accomplished twins. life is a go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Randomize