She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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