Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Randomize