You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
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