i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
